No Trash Talk. Yes, You.

(Sculpture Outside HKMOA)

Anyone who knows me knows I typically avoid discussion events where the attendees are homogeneous, because conversations are not typically diverse. At the risk of alienating some friends, when I reference "homogeneous" I really mean all-female. I would rather be in a room of men, than a room of women, as I feel I would learn more. If I were a man, I would say I would rather be in a room full of women…. (Well, let me get back to you on that thought.) I decided to break this distance rule to see if possibly I was being closed-minded. Last week, I had time, and I attended a panel discussion on The Impact of Social Media on the Female Body Image. I might learn something from a couple dozen women in a room, for the most part - millennials, and surprisingly, two men. Though regarding the men, it was revealed, one is the husband of a panelist, and the other was the AV guy. My worst fears were realized - nothing new. The conversations placed blame, for women's insecurities about how we look and the need for beautifying apps, on not only social media, but just plain media. From Cosmopolitan magazine to Baywatch. Mothers never even came up. Most of us could script this scene. The whole time I kept thinking, we are all perpetuating this body image problem. We are guilty along with the media. My favorite speaker of the evening was Valeria Kechichian, Argentinian skateboarder extraordinaire, an advocate of change, and founder of NGO Longboard Women United, a global humanitarian organization. Down-to-earth, keeping it real, she gave this advice, "Don't trash talk yourself." I suggest tacking this memo on your bathroom mirror. Valeria said it is amazing how your attitude about yourself will change, when you change your affirmation. This simple message made the event worthwhile. Unfortunately I've somewhat heard this advice before. My husband tells me whenever I have a disparaging remark about myself, to not talk bad about his wife. Second lesson of the night, I need to listen more to my husband.

(Graffiti Along Camino de Santiago)

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